Tuesday, July 28, 2009
first time for everything
Please give me the strength to keep moving forward... please guide me through my insecurities and keep me humble.... As time passes and confusion continues don't stop with the signs the little ones the luminous ones.. the confusing or the straight forward...... Change is a challenge one that is not easy and comes from deep within sometimes. Continue to remind me I can do it and I am whatever I create for myself..... although the road to here as been quick with sharp turns I haven't fallen off the path!! I may have been sidetracked but I keep pushing forward and discovering inspiration through many outlets. I will not give up I promise.... I will use my resources, my courage and my surroundings to achieve more then I thought possible.... Please just help me to discover the next step as I am the utmost grateful for what I have received till now I will show my gratitude by striving for more!!!
the weekend continued
Monday made a three day weekend for me and it also marked yet another memorable day for me. Randomly explored NYC with Joseph and Ozzy it was sooo fun!! We did random touristy stuff and just went to different Steve Maddens in which I got a pair I was in love with for only $19.99 they were originally $130!!!! wooohooooo
We went to pollos job racked up on some belts then hit it over to M&M world. That place is like an amusement park and OMG they don't get mad if you eat the M&Ms!!! Then we hit it over to the biggest toy store in the world!!! The evening ended with dinner at my house cooked by yours truly!
We had pasta its fast and cheap but it was extra tasty!!!
How did I ever get soo lucky to enjoy such an amazing weekend. & as for my hang time with Juice it was like old times old old times. Before the butterflies flew into my stomach, before the smile sent chills down my back. It was great it really was
We went to pollos job racked up on some belts then hit it over to M&M world. That place is like an amusement park and OMG they don't get mad if you eat the M&Ms!!! Then we hit it over to the biggest toy store in the world!!! The evening ended with dinner at my house cooked by yours truly!
We had pasta its fast and cheap but it was extra tasty!!!
How did I ever get soo lucky to enjoy such an amazing weekend. & as for my hang time with Juice it was like old times old old times. Before the butterflies flew into my stomach, before the smile sent chills down my back. It was great it really was
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Six Flags fun
Yesterday was awesome!!! I went to Six Flags with the guy I've been dating and we had a blast!! I have no say we were really both leaning away from each other and haven't hung out in a hot minute. So initially when we were still going to six flags together I thought it was gonna be wack. BUT! I had an awesome time with him! We rode the rides, played the games we ate we talked it was all and all a great day! I was a fat ass though all i wanted to do was eat and eat! Quiznos after the park ( his idea my favorite spot) was the perfect ending to a perfect day!
Now I'm sore from my Run and the millions of miles we walked yesterday and today is YANKEE DAY!!!
My dad my Bro & his chick are all going to the YANKEE GAME!! I can't wait they should be here in an hour!! wooohoooo Today is gonna be great!
I've been loving this weekend
Now I'm sore from my Run and the millions of miles we walked yesterday and today is YANKEE DAY!!!
My dad my Bro & his chick are all going to the YANKEE GAME!! I can't wait they should be here in an hour!! wooohoooo Today is gonna be great!
I've been loving this weekend
Friday night
Update Friday night was rough!! I dunno what the hell came over me but i was feeling a bit emotional ( as per usual these days)!! I got home from work and I just grabbed Pollos I pod and started running!! Its been a long time since I ran! i was like Forrest I couldn't stop. In fact I ran to Brooklyn and back!!! I finally made it over the Brooklyn Bridge. I did it all by myself too!! I stopped to enjoy the bridge and read some of the literature. Come to find out the man that originally started the bridge died and his son took over the project. Then when he became ill and could no longer visit the site HIS WIFE finished the project!! ( Strong women in 1887!! That's what i like to hear)
Running the bridge at 11 pm in a frenzy of anger and confusion was just what I needed to do. I cleared my head I checked something off my NYC list and I got locked outta the house. That was too funny!!
My cab driver that evening was great his views on life were one in the same as mine! reminding me that other people think and share the same ideals and thoughts I have. So all this questioning I've been doing lately was all for nothing. I'm not nuts issues only come from miscommunication. The cab driver thought he was having a regular conversation little did he know he was reconfirming my thoughts! Thanks Cabby!
Running the bridge at 11 pm in a frenzy of anger and confusion was just what I needed to do. I cleared my head I checked something off my NYC list and I got locked outta the house. That was too funny!!
My cab driver that evening was great his views on life were one in the same as mine! reminding me that other people think and share the same ideals and thoughts I have. So all this questioning I've been doing lately was all for nothing. I'm not nuts issues only come from miscommunication. The cab driver thought he was having a regular conversation little did he know he was reconfirming my thoughts! Thanks Cabby!
I day dream all day long most people think I live on a cloud my latest one is about Publix Donuts and Chocolate cake!!! Theres nothing like those two tastiest SO FLO treats!!!!
Can't wait till next week Kea arrives( she better remember the donuts!!), then Followed by the arrival of Tish and an additional visit from Max!!! WOOHOOO I can't wait!!!
Can't wait till next week Kea arrives( she better remember the donuts!!), then Followed by the arrival of Tish and an additional visit from Max!!! WOOHOOO I can't wait!!!
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
TRUTH
So there are these truth commercials about the effects of smoking. Now! No one wants to hear the truth everyone "knows" the truth. Its no different with a negative activity like smoking vs your character truths!
We all have a difficult time excepting real as real. Because in actuality that real is just someones Real Opinion. Right?!? kea politely pointed out to me that I have this characteristic where I tend to slap people with the truth as raw as an uncooked steak on a plate. Its real its there and sometimes you just don't want it in that form! Well I just had a slice of truth slapped onto me via email. It was unseasoned uncooked and well it was RAW! Or at least I hoped it was. Man no matter how many times I read the email some of those things are not easy to swallow.
The problem is that I feel like its been a huge miscommunication! Is it two different people seeing the situation from different opinions? Is one right and one wrong? Maybe we will never see it the same because we are different??? The truth doesn't come in a right or wrong format and neither does opinion. But when someone is thrashing at your personality or your character flaws whats the next step???
Tish sent me some words of wisdom stating that well we are who we are and that makes us special. If certain people can rock with it then they are rockin without you. BUT.... what happens when it isn't as simple as someone just saying you talk to much or your dressing wack. How about when it questions your integrity as a person??? Where do you go from there?? Truth I was referred to as manipulative. Truth I'm still trying to pick my stomach up off the floor by where I read the words. Truth I"M NOT.. How do you get to that? How can anyone refer to me as that? I need an example I need to know how you came to this conclusion. Is this the general consensus of my peers??? Truth I'm in shock!
I'm not saying that I am Mother Teresa here but I by no means would put that word in my list of character qualities or flaws. Maybe I need to stare in the mirror long and hard and see if the woman staring back is in in fact twisting things to get what I want. But from the bottom of my heart, soul and body I can say that I would never mean for anyone to feel like I use them or was ungrateful.
Joey reminded me this weekend that its not the situations we get into that make the relationship but rather how we handle these situations which better define the relationship. He reminded me that no one is perfect we all make mistakes but its important to move forward. But how the hell do you approach this?? This is one of those I'm gonna have to dig deep down and really really take some time before I respond.
UGH!!!! why does this have to hurt? why do I have to be so sickened by this "truth"
We all have a difficult time excepting real as real. Because in actuality that real is just someones Real Opinion. Right?!? kea politely pointed out to me that I have this characteristic where I tend to slap people with the truth as raw as an uncooked steak on a plate. Its real its there and sometimes you just don't want it in that form! Well I just had a slice of truth slapped onto me via email. It was unseasoned uncooked and well it was RAW! Or at least I hoped it was. Man no matter how many times I read the email some of those things are not easy to swallow.
The problem is that I feel like its been a huge miscommunication! Is it two different people seeing the situation from different opinions? Is one right and one wrong? Maybe we will never see it the same because we are different??? The truth doesn't come in a right or wrong format and neither does opinion. But when someone is thrashing at your personality or your character flaws whats the next step???
Tish sent me some words of wisdom stating that well we are who we are and that makes us special. If certain people can rock with it then they are rockin without you. BUT.... what happens when it isn't as simple as someone just saying you talk to much or your dressing wack. How about when it questions your integrity as a person??? Where do you go from there?? Truth I was referred to as manipulative. Truth I'm still trying to pick my stomach up off the floor by where I read the words. Truth I"M NOT.. How do you get to that? How can anyone refer to me as that? I need an example I need to know how you came to this conclusion. Is this the general consensus of my peers??? Truth I'm in shock!
I'm not saying that I am Mother Teresa here but I by no means would put that word in my list of character qualities or flaws. Maybe I need to stare in the mirror long and hard and see if the woman staring back is in in fact twisting things to get what I want. But from the bottom of my heart, soul and body I can say that I would never mean for anyone to feel like I use them or was ungrateful.
Joey reminded me this weekend that its not the situations we get into that make the relationship but rather how we handle these situations which better define the relationship. He reminded me that no one is perfect we all make mistakes but its important to move forward. But how the hell do you approach this?? This is one of those I'm gonna have to dig deep down and really really take some time before I respond.
UGH!!!! why does this have to hurt? why do I have to be so sickened by this "truth"
The latest
Yeah yeah yeah so I'm a bit sensitive and yes i really care about my relationships with people. I just had a fabulous weekend in CT with my homies. It's always soo nice to go see Rob-E's family they are the all American perfect family. His Mom made us Breakfast and her and his father BBQ'd for us. We all played wiffle ball, football and even bachi in the back yard!
The Pool party was a huge success the day before it was nice seeing how Rob grew up and meeting more people in his life. He's always been an awesome friend and his weekend escapes to CT always prove that. Some times it is a little difficult as Juice is his bff and that poisonous dude and I never can get it correct. BUT for the first time in a long time we really got along just as friends. It was really nice I miss those days of no pressure and not wanting to kill each other. (Of course there were times when i wanted to kill him !!) OVERALL the trip was an awesome little escape!
I am still dealing with trouble on the friend front with the other Miami natives. :(
The Pool party was a huge success the day before it was nice seeing how Rob grew up and meeting more people in his life. He's always been an awesome friend and his weekend escapes to CT always prove that. Some times it is a little difficult as Juice is his bff and that poisonous dude and I never can get it correct. BUT for the first time in a long time we really got along just as friends. It was really nice I miss those days of no pressure and not wanting to kill each other. (Of course there were times when i wanted to kill him !!) OVERALL the trip was an awesome little escape!
I am still dealing with trouble on the friend front with the other Miami natives. :(
Thursday, July 16, 2009
im down
im feeling some pain today its been going on for a while and now Im starting to check my feelings in at the front desk. I know Im over whelming as a person and i come on strong sometimes and i know that there are times when i dont think before I speak and i wear my thoughts on my sleeve but i never want to hurt anyone. My honesty at times comes off rude I know.
Im just sick and tired of people i love in my life just thrashing me in different ways. I dunno im rambling Im hurt bottom line I don't wanna spill my heart right now im gonna lay down and think about this with some noodles. :(
but is it me? am i do something wrong as a friend or a person? I guess all this time I thought i was being honest and genuine I was the only one.. certain people didn't feel the need to reciprocate. I have no need for people to treat me the way i treat them. I know we are all different and not everyone has the same time and energy I have. BUt JUST BE HONEST WITH ME. take 5 seconds to text me or to call me. have some consideration. and in regards to people from the past Ive been open to reconnecting and well if you take the offer great or make one awesome. But im not chasing nope can't do it!
i dunno i dunno
Im just sick and tired of people i love in my life just thrashing me in different ways. I dunno im rambling Im hurt bottom line I don't wanna spill my heart right now im gonna lay down and think about this with some noodles. :(
but is it me? am i do something wrong as a friend or a person? I guess all this time I thought i was being honest and genuine I was the only one.. certain people didn't feel the need to reciprocate. I have no need for people to treat me the way i treat them. I know we are all different and not everyone has the same time and energy I have. BUt JUST BE HONEST WITH ME. take 5 seconds to text me or to call me. have some consideration. and in regards to people from the past Ive been open to reconnecting and well if you take the offer great or make one awesome. But im not chasing nope can't do it!
i dunno i dunno
Thursday, July 9, 2009
Greatful
Living in Miami for the years I lived there was the greatest choice I ever made in life! I lived i learned I loved and most importantly I learned to love. I appreciate so many things in life since I have known what its like to have no one but yourself around. I learned to love my family to the fullest out there. I spent 9 months writing my brother letters and crying on the other side of the glass. Dealing with that from 1500 miles away wasn't easy. Now I get to celebrate with him all the time when I go to Milford and hold him and hug him yell at him and smile with him.
No I can't wait to see my mom and hug her and hold her scream at her and remind her how much i love her! I love going to Milford and chatting with the family. I am lazy and enjoying the city so i don't get up there every week. But I can't wait to get up there this week end ahhhhh
I LOVE MILFORD!!!
No I can't wait to see my mom and hug her and hold her scream at her and remind her how much i love her! I love going to Milford and chatting with the family. I am lazy and enjoying the city so i don't get up there every week. But I can't wait to get up there this week end ahhhhh
I LOVE MILFORD!!!
Friday, July 3, 2009
realness at its finest
let me bust this down real quick cause I am really hurt and I don't care who thinks I'm sensitive over reacting or keeping it real. THIS IS ME and how i feel if you don't like it don't read it!
I went to Miami! Yes the trip was quick it was brief it was a blast it was a pain in the ass and I rolled deep. Reality is that people like to chill with me so anytime I roll to Miami it's gonna be with at least one other person. When I get to Miami I'll never have more then 4 or 5 days to fit all the people I met over 6 years time. So I apologize if people felt hurt that I didn't make enough time for them or prove to show enough effort to hang out with them. I am only 1 person and I am only human. And not for anything but sometime I think people forget there are things I would like to do too!
I'm quick to help someone or do what someone else wants to do. I prove this time and time again. I read every email, every text, listen to every problem. I have attend break dancing events, bachatta parties, punk rock evenings, hung out with people kids and visited their jobs. NOW many of my friends do all of those things for me. My life is by no means a one way street. BUT BUT yes there I times when I am selfish and want things to go MY WAY. There are many times when people do not want to attend events that I like or want to do So I ignore it.
But I am always ALWAYS grateful and thankful FOR EVERYTHING MY FRIENDS do for both me and my extended friends and family. SO for anyone to ever feel like I was not grateful or that I took advantage is crap.
Further more if and when someone has an issue with me I have continually expressed how important it is to tell me. If you don't tell me how can i fix it????? I don't have a crystal ball and sometimes I really don't know when im acting up. Help a sista out and tell her.
FURTHER MORE i would like to apologize to anyone that felt offended during my MIAMI stay but from the bottom of my heart the trip was too fast too quick and too al over the place. I love and adore my life and friends from Miami but give a sista a break! I am human and I have feelings and we all know that I am sensitive and emotional. So if you guys choose not to answer my calls or return messages that's fine. I tried I failed thanks for everything. I'm sorry for anyone who felt that way it hurts my heart. I'm out on this
I went to Miami! Yes the trip was quick it was brief it was a blast it was a pain in the ass and I rolled deep. Reality is that people like to chill with me so anytime I roll to Miami it's gonna be with at least one other person. When I get to Miami I'll never have more then 4 or 5 days to fit all the people I met over 6 years time. So I apologize if people felt hurt that I didn't make enough time for them or prove to show enough effort to hang out with them. I am only 1 person and I am only human. And not for anything but sometime I think people forget there are things I would like to do too!
I'm quick to help someone or do what someone else wants to do. I prove this time and time again. I read every email, every text, listen to every problem. I have attend break dancing events, bachatta parties, punk rock evenings, hung out with people kids and visited their jobs. NOW many of my friends do all of those things for me. My life is by no means a one way street. BUT BUT yes there I times when I am selfish and want things to go MY WAY. There are many times when people do not want to attend events that I like or want to do So I ignore it.
But I am always ALWAYS grateful and thankful FOR EVERYTHING MY FRIENDS do for both me and my extended friends and family. SO for anyone to ever feel like I was not grateful or that I took advantage is crap.
Further more if and when someone has an issue with me I have continually expressed how important it is to tell me. If you don't tell me how can i fix it????? I don't have a crystal ball and sometimes I really don't know when im acting up. Help a sista out and tell her.
FURTHER MORE i would like to apologize to anyone that felt offended during my MIAMI stay but from the bottom of my heart the trip was too fast too quick and too al over the place. I love and adore my life and friends from Miami but give a sista a break! I am human and I have feelings and we all know that I am sensitive and emotional. So if you guys choose not to answer my calls or return messages that's fine. I tried I failed thanks for everything. I'm sorry for anyone who felt that way it hurts my heart. I'm out on this
strickly for LATI
Home girl I want you to know something. I believe in you and I see how determined you have been through every story, bog, text or email. Conversation through conversation you have constantly showed and explained to me ways you have pushed your self to new heights and offered great advice about it.
Although we are no longer at the same job or even in the same city I still feel like I know whats up with you. Its crazy since our friendship came quickly and my departure came soon after. Yet, I have felt close to you via blogs and advice that you too have helped me push open within myself. Infact had you not suggested this trusty blog site I would not be communicating the way I do nor would I feel as close to you. So this is a prime example. I"M POSTING THIS FOR THE WORLD TO SEE.
THERE IS A MUSIC VIDEO COMING YOUR WAY by Latisha so be prepared world!!!!
I know your going to be awesome and look amazing I wish I was around to offer some assistance but the only thing I can do is offer some good positive vibes and advice. Stay true to the Latisha way of doing things it has never failed you in the past and will launch you closer to your ultimate success. Ask Kea for help advice or good vibes as well she proves to constantly be a source of positivity and great direction. Your a sexy bitch so rock the hell up out that shit son! and oh yeah feel free to come to NYC to shoot I always have a spot for you to crash!
ps please tell me how to go to college for free. I need a masters or a class or something I'm slacking up here just boo timin :)
Although we are no longer at the same job or even in the same city I still feel like I know whats up with you. Its crazy since our friendship came quickly and my departure came soon after. Yet, I have felt close to you via blogs and advice that you too have helped me push open within myself. Infact had you not suggested this trusty blog site I would not be communicating the way I do nor would I feel as close to you. So this is a prime example. I"M POSTING THIS FOR THE WORLD TO SEE.
THERE IS A MUSIC VIDEO COMING YOUR WAY by Latisha so be prepared world!!!!
I know your going to be awesome and look amazing I wish I was around to offer some assistance but the only thing I can do is offer some good positive vibes and advice. Stay true to the Latisha way of doing things it has never failed you in the past and will launch you closer to your ultimate success. Ask Kea for help advice or good vibes as well she proves to constantly be a source of positivity and great direction. Your a sexy bitch so rock the hell up out that shit son! and oh yeah feel free to come to NYC to shoot I always have a spot for you to crash!
ps please tell me how to go to college for free. I need a masters or a class or something I'm slacking up here just boo timin :)
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