hardships

It's no secret that when your down it seems like everything just keeps getting piled on! Sometimes we feel like we have no outlet its bad news followed by bad news.... I personally try to stay positive through my trying and difficult times, yet its a challenge. The questions what if? and why? always seem to remain in my mind when things aren't on "my course". They also say that god will never let anything happen to you that you can not handle. These challenges we incur come at us from all ends.

Although there are times when I feel emotionally and physically drained as though I am defeated by the ocurrance, I keep trucking. I've listed over the last few months goals and ideals for my life. I've been checking them off as they become completed. Other things I wash to the back burner as they seem unattainable. Or at least for the moment! There are few things that I have really GIVEN UP ON in my time. I have surrounded myself with positive people that have given me pushes forward in ways they don't see. I have spent the past few months in New York revisiting old ideas and discovering new journeys. There are times I think What if I was still in Miami? What if i didn't have a car payment or a college loan payment?

I'm learning to take the what ifs and given them an answer. I'm striving to stay on top of my downward turns and make the sour moments lemonade instead of a heart-breaking set-back. It's easy for me to feel like this when it seems things always turn out in my favor. I ask myself again WHY? why is this working out? well.. its because I want it! I deserve it! I'm working towards it! god gave me that challenge as a test to see where I would push myself next! Well world I'm not done yet! Things can only go UP from here! and I can only better myself and the people around me!

As I celebrate my small victory of the morning I must remember not to get ahead of myself! That new challenge will lay ahead and I must stay prepared and focused for when it comes my way. But no matter the out come no matter the hardship of it I'll still find a moment to smile and see the good inside the problem. I PROMISE and Promise me YOU will do the same!

anticipation

It was long over due and the suspense was tearing me up inside It had been so long since I had seen my mom and my whole family together in fact it has been about 2 years since we last sat down together. It was breaking me down inside all I wanted was the fairy book family. DING DING DING I finally got it i packed up left the 305 and 7 months later we ALL got together for dinner. My mother father brother and step father along with my bros gf and my bff Lyndsay. HOLY SHIT we didn't argue once!! It was my moms dream come true :) it makes me all warm inside knowing she got what she always wanted. Sucks that it took the circumstances it took but we have it all together now and I love it.
Moving to NYC was a great decision for me and my family. Growing up has its perks I'll always be my mommy's lil girl and my brother will always be my lil baby bro my little rotten apple! I love him and I can't believe how much he's grown up!! I'm all smiles :) :) :)

lots of thoughts tonight

There is A LOT going on right now but at the same time not too much!

The womans group went great I love that we are going to be involved... hanging out with Irira more has def been very motivating to me and she probably does not even realize it!

Kea is still here and Im loving having her around getting our minds opened to each others worlds is always a blast and she def pushes me to think deeper and to stay creative. We skated I feel like the past 3 days i've lived on a board its fun.

adidas dreams are coming closer to a reality then just a thought so stay tuned for news on that.

I have not furthered my search on becoming a radio personality or opening my jamba juice BUT I am still focused on my spanish lessons and getting back to school. Getting to adidas is going to be the first mission. cause then I'll be in NYC for work and play and really really enjoy this chapter

katie

Yes Katie family sunday today was a blast. Went and partied it up with my Panamanian family for good food great laughs and well no football :( the TV was hidden in the kids room I snuck away for a few views of the Giants game. I woke up this morning wishing I was getting dressed to go to PRIME! Or even the Ale Hizzy to see Heather.

Sundays I really miss Miami and watching football with you guys but I do love New York and I love all the NEW things we are all getting involved in. I love our chats and catching up with you ladies and gents. I do want to visit you guys again shortly as I am in need of sun wet willies and lots of hugs!!!

almost forgot these

Taxi cabs just cruising past

Living close to the seaport is great in the summer time!

my NYC discoveries

Yankee stadium amazing
Strange area of Stuffed animals in Williamsburg... this is a kids worst nightware
9-11 the twin tower lights were shinning we walked over to discover the lights were on a building and shining all the way to heaven!
The Ikea fairy is free and the view is amazing
during a hair apt. read up on my fashion and during in interview with COCO she commented on wanting to collaborate with adidas!! aoooww my 2 loves street fashion and high fashion!!
The Brooklyn Bridge Park had a great view of my apt and was so relaxing the light house ice cream was really good too!

still so many more areas to visit for my NYC chapter

loving life right now :) my miami friends are here the weather is great and ahhhhhhh hopefully soon i will be back at the 3 stripes and not in nj!!! life is sweet!!!! MTV awards

Kanye = a DICK
Taylor swift you go girl
Beyonce = a lady

lady gaga is nuts love her

Jay Z and Alicia LOVE LOVE LOVE THEM

from his 9-11 concert to this Jay does run this town

patience

I do not like to wait for anything!! I have always known patience is an important quality to have but I really have none. I get easily aggravated and easy discouraged at times. The computer moves to slow, traffic the lines at Jamba Juice and now hearing back from the 3 strips! I waited a year to see my mom and these next 2 weeks can't move quick enough to just hug her!

I think its more my laziness that gets in the way of my successes sometimes. And maybe I'm scared to really challenge Change. I hold on to the past with boys and friends. I am learning to dive into the deep end and learn to swim when I'm in already. I have always been the kind to walk from the shallow end. AHHHH JUMP!!! JUST LEAP !!